a very good work here, I appreciate the care you took to preserve the essential feel of the original while still providing a good translation. much enjoyed and instant subscribe!
Yes I wanted to replicate the feeling and general meaning one could glean from reading it in Tagalog, i thought abt the literal translation but it seemed so lukewarm and disempowered in comparison. This way i sacrifice the literalness but gain smth new which is more valuable in my eyes
This is stunning! There is so much magic throughout this poem, especially in the lines "snow-silver stalks" and "orphaned star gleams as in a sterling fleece." This was so melodic and romantic. To think I would've never read this poem if it wasn't for your translation!
Also question — was "darkling" a direct translation? When I came across that line I saw it more as you putting your "signature" on the translation and loved that choice.
most of this actually isn’t a word-for-word literal translation, in my introduction I called it a ‘teleological’ translation rather than a completely faithful one. i wanted to keep the monorhyme and syllable count of the original which meant that i had room to add/subtract from the original. The structure and a lot of the imagery of the original remains here but in many areas i’ve embellished it with my own language in order to adhere to the rhythm and rhyme of the original. The core themes and idea of the poem however, remains the same. in many ways this is more of a poundian reinterpretation, treating translation as an opportunity to create an entirely new yet appreciable standalone work. If u put the poem through Google translate u will find a direct literal translation which is serviceable but didn’t have the power and musicality i wanted to convey, hence my choices here. As for ‘darkling’, it does obvs refer to the mag name but its also a good as word as any for what I think Batute was describing
In any case, thank u for reading, i’m glad u found it as romantic as I did, u will be seeing more like these in the future
Ah ok that makes sense! I did see that note in the introduction but once I started reading I got swept away by the poem and completely forgot about that disclaimer haha. Beautiful work either way! Excited to see your next translated poem.
God this was so good. read it this morning while sleepy and bleary eyed and loved. Read it this evening and loved it again, even more. Great translation work. Awesome
Thank you 😸. I need to get back to work on that, I’ve been distracted by a couple other projects. Actually I’m directing a short film at the end of the month!
impressive work. its really difficult to translate poetry atleast imo. ive been working so long with a collection of mirabai’s poetry and its equally challenging to prioritize textual fidelity or to prioritize rhyme/metre. especially for older works. things like rhythm, rhyme, sound effects (alliteration, onomatopoeia) are hard to recreate in another language. kudos to u man.
That was stunning, savoured it twice. I like the scoop you gave on the philosophy behind your process too. Looking forward to more—translations, originals or otherwise!
Beautiful poem, and thanks for taking the time to translate! It's one of the most important things writers should be doing right now.
Thanks Ian, u will be seeing more in the future
polyglot ACTIVITIES💜
thank you for also including the original
of course, i’ll be doing this for any/all translations i put out
I enjoy trying to read other languages. Stretches my one brain cell
a very good work here, I appreciate the care you took to preserve the essential feel of the original while still providing a good translation. much enjoyed and instant subscribe!
Yes I wanted to replicate the feeling and general meaning one could glean from reading it in Tagalog, i thought abt the literal translation but it seemed so lukewarm and disempowered in comparison. This way i sacrifice the literalness but gain smth new which is more valuable in my eyes
insane. you’re insane
Love u
This is stunning! There is so much magic throughout this poem, especially in the lines "snow-silver stalks" and "orphaned star gleams as in a sterling fleece." This was so melodic and romantic. To think I would've never read this poem if it wasn't for your translation!
Also question — was "darkling" a direct translation? When I came across that line I saw it more as you putting your "signature" on the translation and loved that choice.
most of this actually isn’t a word-for-word literal translation, in my introduction I called it a ‘teleological’ translation rather than a completely faithful one. i wanted to keep the monorhyme and syllable count of the original which meant that i had room to add/subtract from the original. The structure and a lot of the imagery of the original remains here but in many areas i’ve embellished it with my own language in order to adhere to the rhythm and rhyme of the original. The core themes and idea of the poem however, remains the same. in many ways this is more of a poundian reinterpretation, treating translation as an opportunity to create an entirely new yet appreciable standalone work. If u put the poem through Google translate u will find a direct literal translation which is serviceable but didn’t have the power and musicality i wanted to convey, hence my choices here. As for ‘darkling’, it does obvs refer to the mag name but its also a good as word as any for what I think Batute was describing
In any case, thank u for reading, i’m glad u found it as romantic as I did, u will be seeing more like these in the future
Ah ok that makes sense! I did see that note in the introduction but once I started reading I got swept away by the poem and completely forgot about that disclaimer haha. Beautiful work either way! Excited to see your next translated poem.
God this was so good. read it this morning while sleepy and bleary eyed and loved. Read it this evening and loved it again, even more. Great translation work. Awesome
Thanks so much will, eagerly awaiting ur next instalment of Rimbaud
Thank you 😸. I need to get back to work on that, I’ve been distracted by a couple other projects. Actually I’m directing a short film at the end of the month!
you conjure up the most tactile imagery WOW
thank you xay!
Fuego!
Galing!
maraming salamat!
Masterfully done. Your imagery is so effortless within the constraints of the poem.
ur kind words are much appreciated
This is such a beautiful poem with such stunning lines.
Thank u momo!
impressive work. its really difficult to translate poetry atleast imo. ive been working so long with a collection of mirabai’s poetry and its equally challenging to prioritize textual fidelity or to prioritize rhyme/metre. especially for older works. things like rhythm, rhyme, sound effects (alliteration, onomatopoeia) are hard to recreate in another language. kudos to u man.
That was stunning, savoured it twice. I like the scoop you gave on the philosophy behind your process too. Looking forward to more—translations, originals or otherwise!